Choc top bonanza

Just continuing on yesterday's theme/topic, it also annoys me quite a bit that I almost always have to organise stuff to do with other people, and it's hardly ever the other way around. So this lack of contacting other people is kind of my way of protesting against that. If they're fine and dandy without my presence, I'm fine and dandy without theirs too. It just annoys me how it seems as though I'm always wanting to catch up with them, but they don't really want to reciprocate that. Whatever.

Having said all that, last night was a fairly good night with friends, as far as nights with friends go. After having dinner with the James and Yvonne Cheng and family, James and Yvonne Cheng and I went on down to watch The Last Exorcism in Glen Waverley.

Movie was not my choice. Neither was the amount of choc tops we bought. Both decisions, in retrospect, were quite large mistakes. The movie was interesting for the first five minutes, then it was all like, "Why are these people so dumb? Just call the cops!" But it was a slash-and-hacker (a genre of film I detest, by the way), and they never really do make much logical sense. But I guess that's why I don't like them. The funnest part of the whole thing was James and I texting each other during the movie out of sheer boredom.

Also, I spent half the movie wondering where I'd seen the main character girl person. Then it hit me. She looks very similar to Linda Markov. Weird.

Anyway, good times. Hopefully this dinner thing that I'm organising (weird how these things happen, huh) comes off. Doesn't look like it so far, so I'll probably just end up trying to do something constructive instead. Like clean my room. Worst thing is, Sarah, my sister, is leaving for France tomorrow for six weeks, so it'll be like mass boredom when I'm at home and not out doing stuff.

Word of the Day: Dandy

About time

Last night, it finally happened.

I always wondered whether it would. One day, when my seemingly limitless levels of energy would fail me.

Me and my sisters were watching Despereaux on DVD last night. Afterwards, I thought I'd lie down on the couch for a few minutes, because I was slightly fatigued. Lo and behold, I slept for an hour and a half before waking up at 12.

I've always been afraid that one day I'll plan one of my crazy do-an-assignment-until-2-in-the-morning-for-three-nights-in-a-row-adventures, or something similarly important, and I'll just fall asleep from tiredness without even realising. Luckily, this wasn't anything important.

Slightly scary, but not really. I've usually been able to fight through tiredness, but these last two weeks have just been madness. Emotionally draining. And physically. I've been shoveling mulch and going to the gym. AND I've been sleeping at 2 and waking up at 7. Which isn't so bad, except it catches up to you at night. But I haven't been letting it catch me. Until last night. More about emotional exhaustion soon. I was going to post about it, but I'm too tired.

Word of the Day: Tired

Instead of punching a wall

Instead of punching a wall, I'll blog to siphon off my misery.

I would actually punch a wall, except I'd a) wake my family up, and b)have to repair it afterwards, assuming I'm strong enough to break it.

I did reasonably well in everything except the subject that mattered: accounting. I don't know why it hates me so much. I thought I did alright in the exam, but apparently not. Might have been that, in conjunction with the group assignment.

The stupid thing was, the results were sent to my mobile while I was watching 2012 tonight, which added to my stress levels. I hate watching films like that. I'm actually scared of massive, cataclysmic disasters. Just not this particular one, because of various reasons. It also completely screwed up what would have otherwise been one of the best days that I've had this year, or at least in a while.

I'm going to console myself in two ways.

1. I'm definitely working harder next semester. That's my problem. I don't apply myself properly. It's alright with nuff-nuff subjects like management, it just doesn't quite cut it with real subjects like accounting.

2. I've gotten bad marks before and bounced back.

Now I just kind of need to find a way of explaining to my parents without getting destroyed.

I'm not only disappointing them, I've disappointed myself. I expect a lot better of myself, because I know that I have it in me to do it.

I may just partake in some wall-punching tomorrow, provided I get bored and frustrated enough.

Word of the Day: Wall

The Fear

Dear Blog: A miserable day at uni to further compound my miserableness.

Had a 2.5 hour break. People wouldn't, couldn't or didn't pick up their phones, or they were in lectures, or they hate me a lot. Maybe all three together. Who knows. So I ended up being bored and depressed until Mark came along at 11:50 or so. Made me laugh for about ten mins, then he had a lecture. So I became bored for another hour and a half.

French workshop was boring and lonely. Management tute was boring, lonely and weird.

My whole body hurts. I think it's all linked to my knee.

I think that these are all superficial reasons for my unhappiness.

I think it's because, deep down, I'm scared.

I'm scared that I'll grow old, with all the money in the world, but no-one to share it with. I think that's my greatest fear, actually.

I'm scared that no-one cares.

Word of the Day: Scared

Scary

I'll tell you what's scary? Standing in the wall while someone's taking a free kick in football (soccer). That's the stuff of nightmares. Actually, when I reflect now, it's probably less scary when you face the ball. When your back is turned, you wait for the inevitable, shocking pain. Unless they miss. Then the whole wall breathes a collective sigh of relief. Now I know why they don't put microphones near the players on the pitch now. All you would hear during a free kick is the wall going "OMG, it's Ronaldinho, hope he doesn't kick it at me, I don't care if he gets a goal." That would be highly unsportsmanlike, not to mention cowardly.

Speaking of scary, exams are scary. Ludo isn't doing much to help either. "Study hard, or you're going to fail. You better beat MacRob this year, you n00bs." Oh well. What can you do.

On a random side note, not that the aforementioned wasn't random, the winter concert was a blast. It was more funny than fun though, if you take my meaning. The funniest thing was this Year 9 MacRob girl hitting on me, then being disappointed when she found out I was in Year 12, not Year 10. Then going for the guy next to me, who she thought was Year 9, but was Year 11. Hilarious stuff. The performance was alright, but it wasn't that great when you factor in the rehearsal time.

Probably shouldn't get a haircut before Nigel's 18th. I like the way it is now.