Surprise Song Sunday: For Emma - Bon Iver

For all your lies,

Still very loveable.

Word of the Day: Loveable

Surprise Song Sunday: Speak Softly Love - From the Godfather Part III

Exquisite.

Word of the Day: Exquisite

Hits and misses.

I thought the following post had accidentally been deleted, and that it was for the better, as it was a bit emo and not very good. However, owing to the fact that I can't be bothered retyping/editing, and also to the fact that it's ok, I'm going to post anyway. So I'm going back on my decision to go back. Yeah. It starts now!
_____________________

Doing stuff in Warsaw, having deepish chats at the hotel bar, going for a walk in the Warsaw thunderstorm, it's all been good fun.

For some reason, right now, I just want to go home. Or at least, Hong Kong.

I think it has something to do with the fact that doing the same thing every day, with the same people, brings out all the nuts from the bolts. Some people I'm starting to get sick of, although they're quite few and far between.

I'm also starting to miss seeing old friends. People that understand me, I understand them, etc. Same goes with family. Meeting new people has been amazing. Some of these people are fantastic individuals, and I'm glad and grateful to have met them, and will definitely keep in touch with after the trip. However, some people have started to grate on my nerves a little on a part-time basis. But whatever. It's just a couple of weeks, and it's almost over anyway. It's also good for practicing patience and diplomacy.

So in a sense, because of this duality, the good people and the getting on my nerves people, I'll be both sad and relieved when this trip ends.

Anyway, it's not all been doom and gloom. In between breakfast yesterday morning and walking in the thunderstorm last night (craziest thing I've done in a while - not that I really do a lot of crazy things), we managed to fit in a Chopin concert in a Warsaw park.

It was the most beautiful moment on this trip so far. Amazing how we visit death camps etc, and the thing that makes me most emotional is some Chopin in the park.

Right at the start, I actually semi-cried. I believe it was this piece:

The piece that almost made me cry.

Just everything together - the park, learning about the Holocaust, the thinking about relationships, missing home, the beauty of the music. It had a wonderful ability to speak about both yearning, hope, and sadness.

It sounds cheesy, but it just made me wish I had a special someone to share the moment with, and really highlighted for me the major thing lacking in my life right now.

It also highlighted how despite man's propensity for killing each other, we are also capable of indescribable beauty. Music speaks, and when it does, it's in a universal language.

After that piece, I just settled into a sort of melancholy, reflective torpor, rather than acute sadness and yearning.

A break from all that faux-deep stuff now. Warsaw city is pretty ugly to be honest. However, the heart of the city, where the Old City is, is quite nice. Reminded me of Venice a little bit.

Anyway, should be ok by tomorrow. Just need to get some alone time for a few minutes at the bar or something.
__________

So after typing that load of drivel, Sam subsequently picked me up from sitting in the lobby by myself like a loser, and semi-conscripted me into shopping with him, tall Meg, and Scarlett. It was kind of what I really needed at that moment, despite my desire to not talk to anyone for a bit. Cheers Sam.

So right now, I'm in Bialystock, which apparently is in Poland. I pretty much know nothing about it apart from that.

And as predicted yesterday, I'm pretty much ok now. I no longer have a burning desire to get away. I've decided not to let people who are attempting to grate on my nerves to actually do it, which has pretty much solved that particular issue.

So off to Lithuania tomorrow. I almost have no idea what that country involves, which should be interesting.

Word of the Day: Faux

Brahmy

Some people drown their sorrows in alcohol. Other people...well, I don't know what else you can drown your sorrows in really. Apart from variations of alcohol.

I, on the other hand, play clarinet. This is my latest challenge:



Beautiful Brahms.

Highly recommended listening.

Not that I'm drowning my sorrows or anything. I don't exactly know why I'm doing it. I guess, having not picked up the clarinet in anger for about two years, I felt like reliving good times past when I'd create semi-pretty music.

I'm also a lot better at it than I am at guitar. I actually vibe with it. The guitar doesn't fully feel comfortable in my hands. Probably owing to the fact that I've played it for a shorter period of time, coupled with lack of teacher. I'm just not as good at it as I am clarinet.

It's also a good relaxation method. There's something soothing about the mellow tones of a clarinet, more so when they're emanating from me. Probably means I'm an egomaniac or something. Analyse me, psych students.

And, because my life is so exciting, pretty much nothing else has happened since I last blogged. Yep.

Word of the Day: Sorrows

I wanna talk tonight

But it would seem a bit random, if not downright creepy, if I did randomly call you tonight.

I still want to talk though.

Word of the Day: Talk

A proverb charges money to do what an amateur verb does for free

Just to add to what I wrote up late last night, my good friends also have a certain amount of intelligence. Which ties in with making me laugh, because, in my opinion, to be verbally funny requires a very high level of intelligence.

Anyway, I'm going to articulate another thought that I've had for a long time.

See, people always quote these proverbs. Things like "An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind," or "Money can't buy you happiness." I dislike it when people quote these kind of sayings to me. Proverbs like these are just dumb. They can't be proven, and are way too general and extreme.

Let's take the latter proverb, for example. See, I would say that, while money in and of itself doesn't make you happy, it certainly goes a long way to making you happy. Case in point being the guy on the street without a dollar in his pocket. Ask him how happy he is. However, I believe the guy who has millions of dollars in the bank account wouldn't be too happy either if he had nobody to love, and nobody to love him. I believe that a more appropriate saying would be something like "Money isn't the end all and be all in life, but it's certainly good to have, amongst other things, such as friends, love, and fun." But of course, this doesn't fit neatly into a few words, so generalisations and blanket terms must be used.

Also, other ones which are more wishful thinking than actual observations, and their subsequent application when something happens that actually fits the saying. Things like "What goes around comes back around." I wish that were the case too. Unfortunately, from observation, most of the time it isn't. I see people who are complete jerks scoring good jobs, girls, and unconditional adoration from 90% of the world. And then, there are times when they get their come-uppance, and you think "They had that coming." But that's just us fitting that isolated incident into this neat little proverb.

Yes, I realise that I may be over-analysing. But the people who quote these things to me started it. They treat these things as their own personal little bible, like they are correct and incontrovertible in every instance.

There are sayings that actually make sense, and can actually be found to exist in this world of ours, and they are pure gold. My favourite is one that my dad quotes sometimes, and is Chinese. It goes something along the lines of (rough translation coming up):

Firstly, you have to help yourself. Then other people can help you. Then the heavens can help you.

It's absolutely beautiful in Chinese. It's summarise in six characters, three of which are repeated. Say what you like about Chinese, about how hard it is, and confusing, or whatever, but it can be a very poetic language.

This proverb I find to be true. You can see it in everyday life. You have to pull your own weight, do your own work, try your best, before other people can help you, and before luck can go your way. I'm not saying it's always the case, but how many people do you see winning the lottery, and have never done any hard work in their life? A few more that are observable and that I like are:

No bird soars to high if he soars with his own wings

William Blake, I believe that was.

And one to finish off from Chris Martin. Obviously not a proverb, but still. This one applies to me, but it may not apply to you. I like to believe that it touches a spot deep within everybody, because I like to believe that most people have hearts, and feel love sometimes. Possibly one of my all-time favourite quotes. And yes, I have quoted it numerous times.

It's weird that whatever else is on your mind, whether it's the downfall of global economics or terrible environmental troubles, the thing that always gets you most is when you fancy someone.

Word of the Day: Proverb

I used to read Word Up magazine

The following is a rough amalgamation/approximation of the beautiful dreams that I've been having over the last week or so.


We're sitting there, on the beach, by the sea. Or on a bench, in a park. Or on a verdant field of grass on top of a lush green mountain. It doesn't really matter where. It changes every night anyway. It doesn't matter where we are because you're here. And while you're here, sometimes we talk. Sometimes we just sit in comfortable silence, just being happy in the presence of each other. Well, I'm happy. And I'm fairly sure that you are too.


If you didn't get that, that was about a specific person, not you. Or maybe it is you. But just to make it clear, the 'you' in this dream is one specific person, and is almost certainly not you. Unless you are the person in my dreams. Or of my dreams as the case may be.

Blah, blah, blah.

Sometimes I hate having dreams, even though I don't have them very often. If their nightmares, they're just stupid and scary. If they're awesomely good, like the above, it makes you depressed. Seriously. I wake up, lay there for five minutes remembering what happened in the dream. After I remember, I actually feel like crying. No joke. Like, I want to cry right now just thinking about it.

I think it's fairly evident that I hope this dream bears fruit. Fingers crossed.

Apparently dreams are manifestations with your preoccupations, or, in this case, things that are on your mind constantly during the day. Or maybe that's a theory that I made up myself. But, like in most cases, this theory seems to apply here. Go me.



Word of the Day: Dream
Currently listening to: U Got It Bad by everyone's favourite...something, Usher.